“Stream Pies” is for the children
Photo Credit: Zakysant

At “Stream Pies,” we are serving up gooey loads of knowledge. Here, we’ll provide invaluable streaming advice on kickers and DEF teams who are owned in less than 30-percent of Yahoo! leagues. We list the options in order of best option to “least-best” option (with the strongest recommendations starting at the top). Below our recommendations are last week’s and full season results. Points are based on default Yahoo! settings.

Week Seven will probably go down as the worst performance in “Stream Pies” history. Two kickers failed to score four points and one of our defensive recommendations scored negative points. Does that mean you should ignore the advice in this column? Of course not, here’s why:

A) Like Mariano Rivera, a bad outing does not alter our approach. So expect the same fearlessness and creativity you’ve grown accustomed to in this feature.

B) We need the ad money. My kid’s gotta eat. You don’t hate children... do you?

With that out of the way, trust me with your soul as your boy Dudley Do Work gives you another set of kicker and DEF recommendations for the upcoming week. By the way, you’ve got something on your chin. It’s “Stream Pies” residue. Yum.

More after the jump:

Beck no es un perdedor
Photo Credit: Keith Allison 

Oh word? It’s time for another edition of "Don’t Sleep" already? It is crunch time in fantasy football and if you have a team that is struggling, you better start winning pretty damn soon or you will be on the outside looking in come playoff time. Before we get into the players that you shouldn’t be sleeping on for Week Eight, let’s take a look at how my picks did last week.

Quarterbacks from Week Seven
Carson Palmer (OAK)- 8-21 passing, 116 yards, 0 passing touchdowns, 3 interceptions, -2 fantasy points
John Beck (WAS)- 22-37 passing, 279 passing yards, 1 passing touchdown, 1 interception, 10 rushing yards, 1 rushing touchdown, 1 fumble lost, 18 fantasy points
Palmer played horrible, but I wasn’t even expecting him to play this week. Even though he looked about as bad as you can possibly look as an NFL quarterback, keep in mind this was his first game of the season and he has only been practicing with the team for one week. I am still recommending Palmer as a decent add for down the road, but obviously you will have to be patient if you pick him up. I’m expecting a lot of improvement from Carson after the bye. John Beck on the other hand definitely lived up to my expectations. Just as we predicted in last week's "Don’t Sleep" he was able to do something with his feet and get a rushing touchdown. Pair that with just under 300 yards passing and only one pick and you have a great bye week fill-in.

Running Backs from Week Seven
Marion Barber (CHI)- 6 rushing attempts, 39 yards, 1 rushing touchdown, 9 fantasy points
DeMarco Murray (DAL)- 25 rushing attempts, 253 yards, 1 rushing touchdown, 31 fantasy points
I hope you listened and played Murray because he went off against the Rams. It is safe to say he has earned the right for more touches than Tashard Choice and I don’t think the Cowboys will be rushing Felix Jones back from an injury. It will be interesting to see what happens if Murray keeps dominating when Jones comes back. As for Barber, he scored another touchdown, which is the only reason you should be using him anyways. If you need a bye week fill-in, Barber at least has a good chance to get a TD any given week.

Wide Receivers from Week Seven
Greg Little (CLE)- 5 receptions, 31 yards, 0 touchdowns, 3 fantasy points
Doug Baldwin (SEA)- Zeros all across the board for no fantasy points
The game played between the Browns and the Seahawks this week was maybe the ugliest game that has ever been played in the history of football. Neither offense could get anything going and they were making the opposing defenses look amazing. As a Seahawks fan, I never thought I would miss Tarvaris Jackson so much. I wanted to gouge my eyes out after watching Charlie Whitehurst play in the first half, and things never got better in the second half. Hopefully these two teams will move on and remember how to score points again, allowing Little and Baldwin to actually do what they are capable of.

Tight Ends from Week Seven
Ed Dickson (BAL)- 4 receptions, 23 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 2 fantasy points
The Baltimore Ravens offense also looked pathetic against the Jags on Monday Night Football this week. I will just chalk this one up as a bad week for the team and Dickson can expect better results next week against the Cardinals.

Now let’s get to the picks for Week Eight. It’s crunch time for some of you so hopefully these will help! More after the jump:

He’ll get treated like a Foster kid this week
Photo Credit: AJ Guel

At “Stream Pies,” we are serving up gooey loads of knowledge. Here, we’ll provide invaluable streaming advice on kickers and DEF teams who are owned in less than 30-percent of Yahoo! leagues. We list the options in order of best option to “least-best” option (with the strongest recommendations starting at the top). Below our recommendations are last week’s and full season results. Points are based on default Yahoo! settings.

Your boy Daddy Starbucks is once again handling both kicker and team defense duties this week, so you know what that means... um, something really awesome! Yeah.

So get that gullet nice and wide because we’re flushing a whole mess of “Stream Pies” down it.

More after the jump:

White people friendly with the Bucs RB are known as “Graham’s Crackers”
Photo Credit: Matthew Sowell

People forget this, but there was once a time where everything was different. Jonah Hill was fat, two girls did sensational things with one cup, and people had countless explanations for why a guy named “Mims” was hot (pause). The time was 2007, and crazy shit ruled our lives. Things were so out of whack, in fact, that some random dude named Earnest Graham came out of nowhere to tally 10 TDs and over 1,200 yards.

Ah but sometimes things come full circle. Graham, who from 2008-2010 operated in relative obscurity, crept back into the fantasy spotlight the moment LeGarrette Blount went down with a knee injury in Week Five. Most labeled Graham a bye-week fill-in and nothing more. Perhaps this is because the Bucs have not trusted Graham with a serious offensive role since ‘07, or maybe his age (31) threw people off. Regardless of the reason, no one really viewed Graham as a legit, long-term fantasy solution... until he racked up 131 yards against a pretty damn good run defense.

Now owners want to know if there are any legs to this Earnest Graham thing, and the answer is... “possibly” (what? I’m scared of commitment). Of course, your boy Dudley Do Work can’t just come on here and flat out tell you that Graham will be the lead back even after Blount returns, but there’s no reason he shouldn’t be universally owned right now. He’s always had great hands, and is currently sixth among all RBs in targets (30), which is excellent considering the limited playing time he’s had for most of the season. He’s also capable of handling full-time RB duties. Aside from his impressive 2007 campaign, Graham has spent time working as full back over the last few years, which is a very physical position. The transition to feature back shouldn’t pose a problem.

Yes Blount is the incumbent and displayed good power last year, but his 4.3 YPC is over a full yard lower than Graham’s (5.5) and he straight up doesn’t have the versatility in his game that Graham possesses. In fact, for a guy that’s labeled as a bruising RB, Blount hasn’t even been that great in short-yardage situations.

The bottom line is that Blount isn’t some superstar back who has earned the right to have his feature title handed back to him upon his return. If Graham continues to put up numbers, fight for tough yards, and wreak havoc in the passing game, there’s a solid chance he earns enough playing time to warrant flex status (and possibly more) for the remainder of the season.

NFL Real Talk continues after the jump:

Palmer? I Hardly Know Her
Photo Credit: SteelCityHobbies 

Before we get into our picks for this week, let’s take a look at how our boys from Week Six did (fantasy totals based on standard ESPN settings).

Quarterbacks from Week Six
Tim Tebow (DEN) – BYE
Alex Smith (SF) – 17-35 passing, 125 passing yards, 1 passing touchdown, 1 interception, 7 fantasy points
Smith had a pretty rough game against Detroit, but he was able to clutch up when it mattered most and get a win for his team. Even though that means nothing to us from a fantasy perspective, Jim Harbaugh still loves him and has a ton of confidence in his QB. Speaking of Jim, does anyone disagree that he would have knocked Schwartz out if people weren’t there to break it up? As far as Tebow goes, I suggested you add him last week but he had a bye. You could not afford to wait if you wanted him though, so get ready to start loving Tebow time!

Running Backs from Week Six
Jackie Battle (KC) – BYE
Delone Carter (IND) – 14 rushing attempts, 45 yards, 0 receptions, 4 fantasy points
For Battle, we are looking at the same situation we were for Tim Tebow. He had a breakout game going into a bye week, so you could not afford to wait until after the bye to pick him up. This week is the first game that you actually get to evaluate him as a waiver add. Delone Carter had 14 carries, but did nothing with them. I still like him as a guy to claim off waivers because of the workload, but he has to show us something more before he reaches must-own status.

Wide Receivers from Week Six
Doug Baldwin (SEA) – BYE
Darrius Heyward-Bey (OAK) – 6 receptions, 82 receiving yards, 8 fantasy points
See above to Battle and Tebow when it comes to Doug Baldwin. Heyward-Bey continued his strong play and his arrow will continue to point upward with Carson Palmer coming to town. Palmer is willing to take chances downfield and has great decision-making skills. Heyward-Bey is developing into a nice receiver and has reached must-own status.

Tight Ends from Week Six
Benjamin Watson (CLE) – 3 receptions, 35 yards, 3 fantasy points
A big bust in Week Six for Benjamin Watson. Not good since he has Evan Moore breathing down his neck. Moore is much more talented than Watson and he should start stealing playing time from him.

Picks for Week Seven after the jump:

Your gambling picks this week could use a coat of Paint'
Photo Credit: Jeffrey Beall

Last week, I told you that it was important to never make the “obvious bet.” This mantra of mine proved to be accurate in a few cases, especially in the Pittsburgh-Tennessee game, where the Titans were given as much as seven points in some locations. Naturally, they lost the game and didn’t even come close to covering. Like I said, the bookie usually knows what’s up, so don’t fall for his schemes.

Having said that, not all games are “trap” games. Case in point: the Jacksonville-Cincinatti game. The Jaguars were given the favorite nod, which was odd considering they had only won one game (a close one too) and were playing the Bengals who had just come off an impressive victory over Buffalo. So without hesitation, I told you to take Jacksonville. I should have known better. Yes the line was “odd,” but not in the way I previously mentioned. The Jags were the 2.5 point favorite, true, but being a 2.5 home favorite is not an indication of the bookie knowing they would win. In fact, it might actually show hesitation. When a team is at home, they are usually given an automatic three point advantage. So, in essence, Jacksonville was the 0.5 underdogs, but due to the home field advantage got the favorite nod. That alone should have warranted some suspicion. When faced with similar situations, always take the points. Not all games are necessarily “traps.”

With that said, here are my 5 slick picks of the week. We went 3-2 last week to go 5-4 on the season. As always, I throw in a Survivor pick for good measure. More after the jump:

Too Soon?
Photo Credit: Ryan Leighty

At “Stream Pies,” we are serving up gooey loads of knowledge. Here, we’ll provide invaluable streaming advice on kickers and DEF teams who are owned in less than 30-percent of Yahoo! leagues. We list the options in order of best option to “least-best” option (with the strongest recommendations starting at the top). Below our recommendations are last week’s and full season results. Points are based on default Yahoo! settings.

Sleeper isn’t available this week, so your boy is tackling “Stream Pies” dolo. That’s right, this edition of “Stream Pies” will be all Kid Clutch, so get that lube ready, because you’re about to be Star-boned.

More after the jump:

Alex Smith has a 7:1 TD-to-INT ratio
Photo Credit: Monica's Dad 

A lot of players that are available in most of your fantasy leagues had breakout games in Week Five. Before we get into the deep sleepers who can help you out as bye week fill-ins or potential fantasy studs, let’s recap how our "Don’t Sleep" Week Five players performed.

More after the jump: